Chapter 4: The Truth in the Shadows

Standing on the back ridge, I felt something and turned to look out over the field,

and saw the scene.

From my vantage point, I could see everything—the way Ethan clung to Mariah, the hope in his eyes, the uncertainty in hers. It was like watching a scene from a movie I’d already lived through.

In an instant, memories from my last life came crashing in,

until they froze at the last moment.

I saw flashes—snow, blood, wolves, the sound of Mariah’s voice breaking as she chose Ethan over me. My chest tightened, but I forced myself to watch.

That day, Ethan heard that mountain elk had been spotted deep in the wilds.

The kind of rumor that gets city kids in trouble. He’d always been restless, looking for something bigger than himself.

Even though the program lead had warned these city kids—who couldn't even set a trap—not to go into the backcountry alone,

and even threatened to send them home,

Ethan still snuck out on his own.

Mariah worried for his safety, but didn’t want Ethan to get reported and punished either.

She was always trying to protect everyone, even when it meant putting herself at risk.

So she left me a letter and also went out alone into the wilds.

She knew that, no matter what, I’d risk my life to save her.

And, of course, this time was no different.

I went through hell and back, rescued the frostbitten Ethan and the dehydrated Mariah.

Got them past wild bison, dodged grizzlies.

Just when we were about to make it, a faint scent of blood on the wind made me freeze.

Looking back:

Green, ghostly eyes glowed in the dark, stalking us.

We were out of ammo.

But we were surrounded by wolves.

A fear I’d never known swept over me.

I forced myself to stay calm,

thinking that even if I died here, I had to get Mariah out safe.

But when I turned, I saw Mariah sobbing in Ethan’s arms:

"Ethan, if I get to spend my life with you—even die beside you—that's already a blessing."

Her words echoed in my head, sharp and final. I felt like I’d been punched in the gut.

...

As past and present overlapped,

I looked at the perfect couple in the distance, feeling a peace I’d never known.

For the first time, I let myself accept it. Maybe this was how it was always meant to be.

I looked at them one last time,

turned away without regret,

and left.

I walked away with my head held high, determined to carve out a new life—one that belonged to me and no one else.

So of course I didn’t see:

Just as I turned, Mariah suddenly broke free from Ethan’s hand.

Ignoring Ethan’s shock, she shook her head:

"I came for Logan today. I won’t go with you."

Her voice rang out, clear and strong. The whole room went silent.

"Actually, I never liked you. The elder just told me to look out for you."

Then she turned back to Travis, picking up where she’d left off:

"Travis, where’s Logan? Why won’t he come out to see me?"

Her words tumbled out, desperate and pleading. The guys exchanged glances, unsure what to say.

Travis scratched his head, stammering:

"Logan... Logan, he..."

He shuffled his feet, eyes darting to the floor. You could see the guilt eating at him.

Unable to stand Mariah’s pleading eyes, he gritted his teeth and blurted it out:

"He doesn’t want to see you! So he ran away!"

His voice cracked, but he didn’t back down. Sometimes the truth hurts more than a lie ever could.

"What!"

Mariah gasped.

She clutched her chest, stumbling to Travis.

Her breath came in short, ragged bursts. For a second, she looked like she might collapse.

Pleading, she spoke again:

"Travis, you’re lying, right?"

"Logan... how could he not want to see me?"

Her voice was barely more than a whisper, thick with disbelief and heartbreak.