Chapter 2: Cotonou Dreams, Cotonou Nightmares

For May 2018, when wahala full my head and I no get any other option, I use the only 60,000 naira wey dey my hand—na about 150 US dollars—buy one-way ticket from Ibadan go Cotonou.

I remember as I dey inside old Akoto bus, my mind just dey run helter-skelter. All my small hope na that ticket. Rain bin dey threaten that day, na so my nylon bag dey leak small small. If person tell me say I go ever leave Ibadan for Cotonou because of hunger, I for argue. But life na teacher wey no dey write lesson plan.

The plan be say I go work as driver for one hotel construction site wey dem dey call Blue Bay for Cotonou. My work na to dey carry iron rods and materials go and come from Porto-Novo.

As I reach, I see men wey resemble Naija artisans—dem dey wear reflector vest, some dey argue about price of cement in Yoruba, others dey use Igbo dey toast Beninoise girls. The site full everywhere with the kind noise wey dey sweet me small. Na my own kind people dey here, so I no too fear say I go lost.

Na one correct guy from my town arrange the work for me—person wey I never see face to face before, but I trust am. E talk say e sabi the oga for the site well, promise me say I go dey earn between 180,000 and 250,000 naira every month.

I no go lie, the money sweet me. For Ibadan, I no see where I go see that kind pay even if I work for transport union. My guy talk say, "Just try am, hustle no dey kill. Dem no dey chop pride."

Dem dey call this my guy Akin—Uncle Akin. E talk say e dey run small buka for Cotonou with one partner, just like those mama put wey dey Nigeria.

The way e talk about food, e make am look easy—say e go chop correct amala and ewedu for foreign land. E even snap me picture of small buka, show me WhatsApp. I bin dey hope say I go taste asaro there, make I no miss home too much.

But for Benin Republic, things dey cost. Ordinary guest house wey for Nigeria go be three or four thousand naira per night, here e don reach ten or twelve thousand.

E shock me how bread wey I dey buy fifty naira for Oke-Ado don turn 400 CFA here. I call my sister for Naija, complain. She laugh say, "You go chop money, but you go spend am finish there."

I dey envy am.

For my mind, I dey pray make I fit get my own small buka one day, like am. Life sweet for where you get small control. But for now, na hustle dey my front.

When I land, I register for the site, collect my uniform, start work. The place just be like home construction site—nothing special at first.

But as I dey push wheelbarrow with my fellow country people, na so I notice say some of the Beninoise boys dey look us like say we be strangers. One just mutter, "Vous êtes étranger, abi?" I just bone, mind my work, dey answer "Oui, monsieur" as e dey sweet my tongue.

But the first day wey I drive go Porto-Novo, my eye open.

Porto-Novo road rugged no be small. As I dey drive, okada full everywhere, some dey carry chicken, some dey carry coffin for back. I dey laugh for my mind, say na the same Africa everywhere. But something dey different.

I bin think say as Porto-Novo na capital, e no fit worse pass my hometown. But as I reach? The place just be like Nigeria for 1980s.

You go see Peugeot 504, dem never die finish for here. People dey hawk bread for tray, dey hail you with French and Yoruba mix. I dey look, dey wonder if na time travel I do enter.

Shops full everywhere, plenty get half-French signboard. Small shops dey sell used kerosene stove, manual washing machine, all those house things. You go see line of shops with CK and Nike write for English.

Some shop people dey shout, "Frère! Frère!" as I waka pass. Dem sabi sell, but dem no dey rush person like Naija traders. The shops full, but nobody dey hurry. E get one old woman, she dey plait hair for roadside, she greet me with wide smile, her wrapper tie well well.

First one month, I just dey mind my business—carry materials, rush go back site.

My body no still dey comfortable, so I no too dey find trouble. I dey send money go house, dey call my mama every Sunday with small credit. My head just dey for survival.

But one day, by chance, I enter casino just to catch cruise.

E be like make I just see how oyinbo life be. The light for inside casino bright like Eko hotel during December wedding, the sound dey confuse person. I just dey look, dey observe. Na my first time near that kind place. My mind dey do me one kain, but I no fit carry leg comot.

Na there I first feel that rush wey money dey bring.

As I see men dey press button, women dey shout as dice roll, na so my own blood begin hot. I play small—five hundred naira equivalent. As I win small, e sweet me. I lose, e pain me, but the rush still dey my body like ogogoro.

Within two months, I don dey vex easy, dey para anyhow. If I lose, I go dey find wahala with drunk people for road, dey blow horn like person wey craze.

Some nights I go just dey drive with vex, dey curse for traffic. People dey look me, but I no send. If money waka from my hand, I go dey reason how I go recover am. I dey notice say my temper dey hot pass before.

Until one day, I hear serious noise for outside my guest house—the first time for my life I hear gunshot.

The sound loud like thunder, make me jump for bed. My heart nearly comot for chest. Everybody for guest house begin shout, lock door. Na so my body begin shake, I dey peep through curtain.

I look down from my window, na so I see one man just dey for ground, blood full everywhere.

People gather, dey talk in low voice. Some dey snap picture with phone, others dey drag body go one side. My hand cold. For my mind, I dey pray say, "God, abeg, no let my own reach this one."

Later I hear say the man owe casino plenty money. When dem come carry am for public, e fight back—na so casino people shoot am for head.

E shock me. I remember say for Naija, dem go use jazz or call police, but here, na direct bullet. The fear wey enter my body no get name. I dey reason how money fit turn man to target just like that.

After that day, I just run from anything wey concern gamble.

I no even pass casino road again. I pack my small cloth, change guest house. Anytime I hear dice sound, na so cold dey catch me. My prayer na, "Make money come my way without wahala."

But the thing wey you dey fear, na him go still find you.

E be like shadow—anywhere I go, na im go dey trace me. Sometimes, when night cold, I go just dey remember that gunshot, dey pray make my own no end for street. I dey pray make the next gunshot no get my name inside.