Chapter 2: Survival, Shakara, and Madam’s Eyes

The only thing wey separate the rooms na thin wall and that kain wrapper curtain wey no get weight. The laughter wey dey fly between young oga and the new maid quick turn to quiet whisper, then soft moaning, then words wey just dey make your body hot.

Mosquito dey hum for your ear, and the sound from the other room dey bite your chest like pepper. Every small giggle, every gasp, na so your blood dey rush. Na true say, walls for compound no dey hide secret; na only shame dey hide for under wrapper.

You hear everything. You no fit stop am, you no even fit waka commot.

Na so you siddon for your bed, your hand dey shake. Even if you try cover ear with pillow, the sound go still find you. For this kain matter, na silence dey loud pass.

This no be your own time. Young oga na oga, anything wey e want, na so e go be.

You think say you fit fight, but who get voice for oga house? You just dey swallow your pain, dey tell yourself say e go better.

You no even last reach when one correct big madam go come dey drag love with you, or when you go run commot with belle make e come realise say e love you. You lose give another maid—just another housemaid like you.

Na so this life be—no be film trick. Sometimes, na ordinary dust go win over fine powder.

You dey fine and gentle; she dey fair and get body. Everybody get their own package, but na she win because she be the latest. Before you know, another new one go pass her. You no go ever be the only one, no go ever special, and as you dey old, nothing go remain wey you fit use hold body.

The small mirror wey you get for bag, you go look yourself—'How this life be so?' If you dey shine today, na another person go shine tomorrow. Everybody dey market for this place; only your season dey short.

No matter the time, people always like new thing, abi? Especially people like young oga wey get plenty option.

Na so one of the old maids go whisper, 'Na new shoe dey make leg happy.' Your chest go tight, but you no fit cry for public.

You no sleep all night, just dey brace yourself. Second and third day, you still dey serve young oga like say nothing happen.

You dey force smile, dey carry tray with steady hand, but your mind dey far. Sometimes, your eyes go red, but you go say na smoke for kitchen.

But when e sometimes hold your hand, you no dey rush answer am again.

Your body go stiff small, your eyes go dey look another place. You dey tell yourself, 'No be everything person dey rush answer.'

After all, all the fine maids for this compound na him own. If you no gree, e no go vex—e go just choose another person.

You know say your own dey hang for thin rope; na so you just dey careful, dey protect your small pride.

One day, e carry another maid enter room for afternoon. You find one correct excuse go see madam for house.

You talk say you wan return book or fetch water for store. You waka with quick step, but your heart dey beat like drum for festival.

After you finish your matter, you just drop am small: say young oga don grow, e don be man, but e dey do anyhow these days.

You clear throat, dey wonder if your mouth no go land you for trouble. You lower your voice, look ground like pikin wey chop forbidden meat. You no wan overdo, but you know say madam dey sharp.

Madam eye sharp immediately.

She raise eyebrow, her voice cool like early morning. You feel the cold for your back.

You add am, like person wey dey think well, say maybe na just small time, after e tire for the thing, e go calm down focus on him book.

You smile small, pretend like say na just normal wahala. You even add, 'Boys dey always do shakara before exam.'

But madam vex.

Her hand slap table, cup for hand nearly fall. 'Na so this pikin wan disgrace person for house? E no fear God?' Her voice sharp pass pepper for your eye.

"Pikin wey no get self-control now, e go suffer when e old. How person go dey do anyhow like that?"

She snap her fingers call Mama Kudirat, her correct nurse from when she marry, order am to go check young oga room, make she see which small witch dey use woman matter spoil the boy wey suppose dey read book.

Mama Kudirat face hard like fresh yam. You just dey tremble, your knees weak like water leaf. The house come cold.

You kneel down dey shake, dey blame yourself say your mouth too loose, dey knock your head for ground.

For your mind, na only prayer fit save you. "Madam abeg, I no talk am to spoil anybody!" But you know say matter don pass your hand.

You no fit look madam face, but you know: from today, all the fine maids for young oga side go soon dey market. The ones wey go remain na the ones wey no fine or don old.

You dey hear whisper for corridor. Some dey cry, some dey pack load. House don scatter like market after rain.

You, compared to the rest, just dey shine. Madam believe say you dey innocent, so na only you she allow to dey serve young oga close.

You dey thank God, but your heart dey cut. You dey remember say one day, your own luck go finish.

Now, na only you dey with young oga.

Na only your voice dey echo for corridor. You dey serve food, sweep room, dey answer bell. Everybody dey avoid una side.

You dey clean am after bath, but e just grab your hand, press am for him body.

E hold you tight, as if say if e loose hand, you go disappear. You feel the heat, the wanting for him touch.

E beg you make you stay with am for night, make you keep am company.

Him eyes dey beg, voice soft like beans wey dem soak overnight. You fit see say e dey hungry for more than food.

You remove your hand, do like say you no send. "Madam talk say make servant no dey seduce oga. Young oga suppose focus on him book."

You even adjust your wrapper, carry your face go another side, make e no see say your heart dey jump. You dey play your card well.

Since Mama Kudirat catch am with maid, young oga never touch woman for some time.

Even the small rat for house know say wahala don jam am. E dey avoid trouble like say e dey dodge cane.

If person never taste enjoyment before, e different. But if you don chop am before, then dem deny you—na there wahala dey.

You dey watch as him eye dey red sometimes, like goat wey dem tie. You sabi say him blood dey hot.

Your shakara make am want you more. As e still get that youthful energy, e just carry you enter him body.

Na so e beg, e promise, e talk plenty. You dey do shakara, but your body dey answer.

This time, you wise up: you give am small, then stop before e reach where e dey go.

You dey hold back, dey tell am say 'No be every time dem dey reach final.' The boy go dey beg, your own body go dey do you too, but you hold yourself like person wey dey fast.

Young oga begin dey depend on you; e must dey pet you.

If e chop, na you e go call. If e get anything, na you e go find. Sometimes, e go bring small gift come your room.

Anytime food or enjoyment dey, na you e dey remember. E begin read book well, just as you talk.

E go dey recite lesson for you, dey show you pass mark. You go dey nod like mama wey get sense pikin.

Everybody for house know say you be the favourite maid for young oga side, so dem dey respect you.

Old maids dey greet you well, new ones dey look you with eye. Some dey jealous, some dey pray make your luck rub them small.

When madam ask the tutor about young oga, the answer sweet her, so she happy with you.

You dey hear madam dey laugh from parlour. Even tutor dey nod, dey hail your sense.

For a while, you even begin feel say you and the main wife no get difference.

Your step dey change, your smile dey long. Some days, you fit even dey forget say you be maid. Na so small pride dey enter your voice.

But one day, young oga follow him cousins go one of those coded joints, come see new world.

Dem sneak out for night, come back with perfume wey no dey for house. E come dey brag about wetin e see for city.

Men—if dem too chop, wahala; if dem no chop, wahala still dey.

You dey shake head, remember your mama talk say 'too much enjoyment dey turn belle.'

You just hold your head, spend small money, send trusted servant go report to oga.

Na so you plan am well. You no talk, you no shout. Just small transport for loyal guard, story reach oga ear.

Young oga collect beating, dem lock am for house.

E cry like goat for Sallah. Even the gate man dey pity am. Wahala full house.

When you go check am, you see am dey bite him lip, tears for eye—not because e sorry, but because e no like say dem dey control am.

E throw book for floor, dey pace up and down. "I no be small pikin!" e shout. You just siddon dey look.

E say e wan get power, get him own house, marry fine wife, keep side chicks, waka as e like, enter coded joint anytime.

E dey talk with pride, as if say all na achievement. You dey watch am, your face still, but your mind dey reason another thing.

You just laugh.

The laugh na one kain—no be joy, no be wickedness. E just burst from your mouth like wind wey blow for harmattan. You dey see say life no dey play fair with anybody.

You laugh say e still be pikin—other men dey dream to conquer world, but e own na wife, side chick, and coded joint.

For your mind, you dey reason say, 'If to say na farm, na only yam e go plant.'

But as you dey laugh, your heart just cold.

Na inside you the cold dey bite—like say harmattan enter your bone. Your laughter na cover cloth, but your spirit don tire.

So na this be your dream—to marry man like this.

You remember your small wish, dey shame for your thought. You dey ask God, "Na this be better life?"

Worse be say, you don suffer for am, but the thing no go ever reach your hand.

Your body dey heavy, your eyes dey cloud. You dey talk to yourself, 'Na so life be, nothing dey sure.'

As cock crow, you dey wonder if tomorrow go bring better luck or just another round of wahala.