Chapter 2: Under Her Skin

2

The space inside the mattress is tight, and lying still quickly makes my arms and legs go numb.

But I savor it.

Because tonight, I’ll be closer than ever to the woman I’ve dreamed about for years.

Lillian Carter—the woman I’ve secretly loved for seven years.

If not for her, I would never have come up with such a crazy idea.

Night falls.

Lillian finishes her long day and drags her tired body onto the bed.

The moment she settles in, I feel the most exquisite sensation in the world.

Even separated by a layer of fabric, I can sense the smoothness and delicacy of her skin.

Her long, slender legs overlap with mine, their weight barely noticeable.

Her waist is slim, her hips full, her back just a little bony. She always leaves her socks on, even in summer, and sometimes mutters to herself when she’s half-asleep.

I bear her weight, both thrilled and nervous.

Very soon, her scent seeps through the mattress, filling my mouth and nose.

That fragrance is faint, gentle, and enchanting—like jasmine drifting on a summer night breeze, intoxicating and impossible to resist.

After a while, she suddenly turns over and crawls across the bed.

In that instant, I feel like I might explode.

In these seven years, I’ve never been so close to the goddess in my heart.

It’s as if I’m embracing her.

She’s like my wife.

I greedily savor the intimacy with her skin, breathing in her scent.

She seems to be sweating; her sweat soaks through the sheets and mattress.

I press my lips to the damp patch, pretending for a second it’s her cheek, her skin, and not just a ghost of her.

In this moment, I feel like my life is complete.

The old floorboards creak as she tosses, her weight shifting above me, and for a second I imagine I’m part of her world—part of her life. My heartbeat drums in my ears as I memorize every tiny pressure point, every movement. She sighs, exhausted from her long hours working the register at the corner grocery, and the hint of her vanilla shampoo drifts down, blending with the musky smell of the sheets. For a fleeting moment, I let myself believe I belong here, that the warmth I feel from her body could ever be real.

Tonight, I’m closer than I’ve ever dared. Maybe too close.